Managing Conflict

Hi, and welcome to Headspace on managing conflict. So it doesn't matter too much what the the nature of the conflict is, what's caused the conflict. Our starting place here today is what can we do as individuals to create an environment where there is at least the opportunity for resolution, where we can approach the conflict from a place of calm, a place of clarity, responding skillfully rather than reacting to each and everything that the other person says or does. So more often than not, we head into these conflicts looking to either blame another person, perhaps looking to win an argument. And because of that, we have to hold on very tightly to a fixed position; which is in opposition to their fixed position. Now, we can't control what that other person does, but by letting go of that fixed position ourselves, we can begin to create some space in the conversation. We can move towards healthy communication. So we're gonna practice an exercise; which at first can sound quite counter intuitive to the rational intellectual kind of aspect of our mind, but it's actually really effective, not only in calming our own mind, but in accepting the other person. In being able to sort of listen to them, perhaps in a different way. So we're gonna begin just by getting comfortable, eyes open, and just taking two big deep breaths breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth. And with the second out-breath, just gently closing the eyes. So, as always, just feeling the weight, grounding the body, feeling that contact against the seat beneath you, and feet on the floor, hands on the legs. And, just taking a moment to check in with your body, notice how the body's feeling. Normally, if there's a lot of conflict, we might feel a sense of restlessness in the body. If the conflict's a little longer standing, we might feel a sense of heaviness, tightness, or tension in the body. Just noticing how the body feels. Noticing how the breath in the body feels as well. So again, if there's a lot of conflict, and very often we'll feel that in our breath. Rather than trying to breathe in any special way, just allowing the body to regulate itself, to regulate the breathing in its own time. So as you follow the breath in that way, without breathing in any special way. Just like you to imagine that with every in breath you're going to take away any of the frustration, the anger of the other person involved in this conflict. Again, it may not make sense immediately, that's okay, but we're gonna imagine taking on all of their frustration. So that they have peace of mind. So they feel calmer. However you like to think about it. And with every out breath, we're gonna imagine sharing with them our own sense of calm, peace of mind. Again, this isn't to look for a resolution. This...